Wednesday, December 3, 2008

drogging blunk

alright kids, so I've had a few.....

- That joke isn't funny any more is the absolute peak of the Smiths output, both musically and lyrically. Likewise the tune Build presents the Housemartins at their peak.

- Listening to one song by the the Beasts of Bourbon will leave you feeling dirtier than a week staggering around the fleshpots of Patpong.

- Buying a pub is easier than it sounds.

- Cooking your wife a piece of grilled atlantic salmon with a greek salad will get you more loving than a fat wallet and a Ferrari.

- Playing the stockmarket is like throwing money into a poker machine with alzheimers.

- Blogging is like wanking with the curtains half closed. You want a few people to notice, but not too many. And certainly no-one you know.

- Ecstasy is the opium of the masses. Opiates are reserved for genuine fuckwits.

- In a restaurant order your steak rare if you prefer it medium. In pubs, if you like your steak rare, order chicken.

- White wine is for the ladies and fish fanciers. And poofs.

- D minor is not the saddest of all keys. A minor is far sadder. And easier to write in.

- Fat people hate their belly being touched. Seriously.


1 comment:

Manuel said...

bwahahahahaha especially the last......I know it's true too....